1 00:00:04,972 --> 00:00:07,951 In heav'n the bells are ringing 2 00:00:07,975 --> 00:00:09,419 Ding dong merrily on high. 3 00:00:09,443 --> 00:00:11,821 - You are one cheeky madam! - Hmm. 4 00:00:11,845 --> 00:00:13,313 Good to see nothing's changed. 5 00:00:14,348 --> 00:00:16,283 - Sidney! - Hello, Sid! 6 00:00:17,284 --> 00:00:19,329 We weren't expecting you until tomorrow. 7 00:00:19,353 --> 00:00:21,531 Yeah, I cadged a lift on the diplomatic flight, didn't I? 8 00:00:21,555 --> 00:00:22,466 How's Aunt Fliss? 9 00:00:22,490 --> 00:00:25,068 Yes, she's good. Sends her love. Oh, she's got news. 10 00:00:25,092 --> 00:00:28,738 One for you. One for you. 11 00:00:28,762 --> 00:00:31,441 And this comes with strict instructions to open 12 00:00:31,465 --> 00:00:32,797 before Christmas. 13 00:00:39,540 --> 00:00:42,919 I hope this will go perfectly with your sage twinset 14 00:00:42,943 --> 00:00:45,021 for the WI Committee dinner. 15 00:00:45,045 --> 00:00:47,957 The Duchess of Windsor has an identical one. 16 00:00:47,981 --> 00:00:49,792 Ghastly woman, but there's no denying 17 00:00:49,816 --> 00:00:51,751 she does have impeccable taste. 18 00:01:01,995 --> 00:01:03,190 Oh! 19 00:01:05,399 --> 00:01:07,310 I don't know what they've been feeding you, 20 00:01:07,334 --> 00:01:10,463 but you're all skin and bones. 21 00:01:11,638 --> 00:01:14,984 - It's good to be home. - Sit down. Sit down there. 22 00:01:15,008 --> 00:01:16,252 Plans for the holiday, Sid? 23 00:01:16,276 --> 00:01:19,212 Oh, you know, Mrs M's home-cooked food, and a nice quiet Christmas. 24 00:01:22,883 --> 00:01:26,877 Oh! Oh! That is... Oh! 25 00:02:22,476 --> 00:02:24,153 Any idea who she is? 26 00:02:24,177 --> 00:02:29,692 Well, the money's on Scarlett Dreyfuss. December 1946. 27 00:02:29,716 --> 00:02:33,229 The papers called it the Red Riding Hood murder. 28 00:02:33,253 --> 00:02:34,864 Did a Big Bad Wolf get her? 29 00:02:34,888 --> 00:02:37,033 She was leading lady in the Christmas pantomime. 30 00:02:37,057 --> 00:02:39,869 Left after the dress rehearsal, and was never seen again. 31 00:02:39,893 --> 00:02:43,172 Next day, the cleaning lady finds the bed unslept in. 32 00:02:43,196 --> 00:02:45,665 And downstairs, there's blood and signs of a struggle. 33 00:02:46,900 --> 00:02:48,978 How did they know it was murder? 34 00:02:49,002 --> 00:02:50,380 A local man confessed, 35 00:02:50,404 --> 00:02:52,715 though he wouldn't say what he did with the body. 36 00:02:52,739 --> 00:02:55,385 Currently serving life in HMP Wynchurch. 37 00:02:55,409 --> 00:02:56,843 Well, that's something. 38 00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:01,512 What a waste. 39 00:03:10,991 --> 00:03:12,015 Have I missed something? 40 00:03:13,226 --> 00:03:15,805 The pantomime's being held at the Haydock this year, 41 00:03:15,829 --> 00:03:17,440 so they need a much larger cast. 42 00:03:17,464 --> 00:03:19,642 No chance. Spend my holiday cooped up in a theatre? 43 00:03:19,666 --> 00:03:23,079 No, thank you. Mind you, Mrs M, you're the old pro. 44 00:03:23,103 --> 00:03:25,682 Well, I was roped in for Fairy Godmother 45 00:03:25,706 --> 00:03:27,684 while on tour with my late husband. 46 00:03:27,708 --> 00:03:30,620 And I hear Father Brown is quite the thespian. 47 00:03:30,644 --> 00:03:32,306 Pontius Pilate. 48 00:03:33,613 --> 00:03:35,809 I think I gave a convincing performance. 49 00:03:36,950 --> 00:03:38,919 The reviewer said it was murderous. 50 00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:42,687 Speaking of which, remember this? 51 00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:57,714 I spy the honorable Penelope Windermere. 52 00:03:57,738 --> 00:03:59,348 Quite the box office draw. 53 00:03:59,372 --> 00:04:01,017 Let's pray she can sing and act. 54 00:04:01,041 --> 00:04:02,852 They won't be coming to listen to her. 55 00:04:02,876 --> 00:04:05,421 I hope you don't expect me to audition. 56 00:04:05,445 --> 00:04:06,469 Douglas. 57 00:04:12,319 --> 00:04:15,198 Douglas, shake a leg and let them in. 58 00:04:15,222 --> 00:04:18,659 And may God have mercy on our souls. 59 00:04:25,365 --> 00:04:29,946 Good afternoon. I'm Prudence Bovary, the artistic director. 60 00:04:29,970 --> 00:04:32,615 Leading players, Rose Marie Sturgess 61 00:04:32,639 --> 00:04:35,118 and Dr. Eugene Cornelius. 62 00:04:35,142 --> 00:04:40,857 And my son Douglas - our stage manager, actor, and pianist. 63 00:04:40,881 --> 00:04:42,792 Aren't there a lot of you? 64 00:04:42,816 --> 00:04:45,718 Right. Douglas. 65 00:05:02,102 --> 00:05:03,846 Who are you reading for? 66 00:05:03,870 --> 00:05:06,999 - Prince Charming! - It's played by a girl. Next! 67 00:05:11,044 --> 00:05:12,103 Next! 68 00:05:13,680 --> 00:05:16,259 Bunty Windermere, auditioning for Cinderella. 69 00:05:16,283 --> 00:05:18,013 I don't think so, dear. 70 00:05:21,888 --> 00:05:23,432 Sleeping in the cinders. 71 00:05:23,456 --> 00:05:25,301 That's how I got my name. 72 00:05:25,325 --> 00:05:29,138 Ever since my father died, things haven't been the same. 73 00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:32,742 Except mother bosses me around. That's just the way it goes. 74 00:05:32,766 --> 00:05:35,759 Like the ash in the fireplace, she does get up my nose. 75 00:05:38,839 --> 00:05:40,316 Next! 76 00:05:40,340 --> 00:05:45,335 - Are you ready? One. One, two, three. - Next! 77 00:05:46,012 --> 00:05:49,926 This is Bridget McCarthy, auditioning for the Fairy Godmother. 78 00:05:49,950 --> 00:05:52,762 At the stroke of midnight, please beware - 79 00:05:52,786 --> 00:05:55,031 these things return to what they were. 80 00:05:55,055 --> 00:05:58,267 Your gown returns to rags and cloak. 81 00:05:58,291 --> 00:06:00,624 Your pumpkin is no more a coach. 82 00:06:01,494 --> 00:06:08,044 But dance, be gay, perchance to meet - a prince to sweep you off your feet. 83 00:06:08,068 --> 00:06:10,213 Young man! How tall are you? 84 00:06:10,237 --> 00:06:11,781 - Six foot two, why? - Name? 85 00:06:11,805 --> 00:06:14,517 Sidney Carter. Whoa, whoa, whoa - I'm not auditioning. 86 00:06:14,541 --> 00:06:17,067 No, I'm just here for moral support. 87 00:06:26,853 --> 00:06:28,048 Next! 88 00:06:31,224 --> 00:06:32,224 Dear God! 89 00:06:35,528 --> 00:06:39,761 The lights turn blue. It is dead midnight. 90 00:06:40,901 --> 00:06:42,028 What do I fear? 91 00:06:42,969 --> 00:06:45,915 Myself? There is none else here. 92 00:06:45,939 --> 00:06:47,430 Richard loves Richard. 93 00:06:48,642 --> 00:06:53,155 That is, I am who I am. 94 00:06:53,179 --> 00:06:55,910 Is there a murderer here? No. 95 00:06:58,351 --> 00:07:02,914 Yes, I am. Then fly. 96 00:07:04,291 --> 00:07:07,659 Who from, myself? 97 00:07:20,707 --> 00:07:21,834 Thank you. 98 00:07:30,483 --> 00:07:31,542 Yes, sir? 99 00:07:32,619 --> 00:07:34,730 Tell me about Benedict Clough. 100 00:07:34,754 --> 00:07:39,135 Benny? Nice lad, but simple, if you get my drift. 101 00:07:39,159 --> 00:07:41,437 Made a living making bicycle deliveries. 102 00:07:41,461 --> 00:07:43,089 And Scarlett Dreyfuss? 103 00:07:43,563 --> 00:07:46,123 A newcomer, rather racy for these parts. 104 00:07:46,433 --> 00:07:49,045 Two ex-husbands and a roving eye. 105 00:07:49,069 --> 00:07:50,713 She must have ruffled a few feathers. 106 00:07:50,737 --> 00:07:52,381 She ruffled Benny's, all right. 107 00:07:52,405 --> 00:07:55,051 He followed her round like Mary's little lamb. 108 00:07:55,075 --> 00:07:58,087 So when she went missing he was number one suspect? 109 00:07:58,111 --> 00:08:02,525 He was spotted bicycling home in the vicinity with scratches on his face. 110 00:08:02,549 --> 00:08:05,528 When the police turned up to question him, he bolted. 111 00:08:05,552 --> 00:08:08,522 And when apprehended, confessed his socks off. 112 00:08:09,489 --> 00:08:12,357 "I did something bad to Miss Scarlett." 113 00:08:13,093 --> 00:08:16,552 Tried to assault her. When she fought back, he panicked. 114 00:08:17,864 --> 00:08:20,443 Caved her skull in with a doorstop. 115 00:08:20,467 --> 00:08:21,730 Did he, now? 116 00:08:22,802 --> 00:08:25,481 Why all the interest in a closed case? 117 00:08:25,505 --> 00:08:28,017 Because according to the postmortem, 118 00:08:28,041 --> 00:08:31,443 Benedict Clough's confession was a pack of lies. 119 00:08:35,181 --> 00:08:37,226 Fairy Godmother... 120 00:08:37,250 --> 00:08:38,650 Bunty Windermere. 121 00:08:40,220 --> 00:08:41,998 I know you had your heart set... 122 00:08:42,022 --> 00:08:46,084 No, no, no, that's wonderful. Don't you worry about me. 123 00:08:47,694 --> 00:08:49,185 And you are... 124 00:08:51,598 --> 00:08:52,575 Prompt. 125 00:08:52,599 --> 00:08:55,644 An indispensable part of any production. 126 00:08:55,668 --> 00:08:58,069 Yes, yes, of course it is. 127 00:08:59,005 --> 00:09:02,203 And Father Brown is... Daisy. 128 00:09:03,910 --> 00:09:05,276 And so is Sid. 129 00:09:07,647 --> 00:09:10,292 That's a mistake. I didn't even audition. 130 00:09:10,316 --> 00:09:12,061 And how can you have two Daisys? 131 00:09:12,085 --> 00:09:15,419 I think there is only one Daisy, but she's in two halves. 132 00:09:26,800 --> 00:09:28,444 The house is all decorated. 133 00:09:28,468 --> 00:09:34,016 Holly and ivy, and all the old decorations, except for the tree, 134 00:09:34,040 --> 00:09:36,509 which I'm saving for Christmas Eve. 135 00:09:37,644 --> 00:09:40,956 Padre. I'd say this was a nice surprise, 136 00:09:40,980 --> 00:09:43,211 but then I'd be lying on both counts. 137 00:09:44,317 --> 00:09:46,862 Benny isn't very fond of the police, 138 00:09:46,886 --> 00:09:49,481 so they thought it best a chaperone was present. 139 00:09:50,256 --> 00:09:56,739 Benny, this is Inspector Mallory. He's not as scary as he looks. 140 00:09:56,763 --> 00:09:58,459 Does he know when I'm going home? 141 00:10:00,300 --> 00:10:02,929 I'm afraid not, but I do have some questions. 142 00:10:04,471 --> 00:10:08,751 In your confession, you said you hit Scarlett on the head with a doorstop, 143 00:10:08,775 --> 00:10:11,244 which you then buried with the body? 144 00:10:13,513 --> 00:10:18,961 We found the body. And there's no signs of skull trauma. 145 00:10:18,985 --> 00:10:20,544 Or a murder weapon. 146 00:10:28,828 --> 00:10:32,007 When arrested, you said, "I did something bad to Miss Scarlett." 147 00:10:32,031 --> 00:10:34,009 Can you explain what you meant? 148 00:10:34,033 --> 00:10:36,366 - She said I'd go to hell. - Nonsense. 149 00:10:37,537 --> 00:10:42,703 God forgives everyone who confesses their sins and tells the truth. 150 00:10:45,378 --> 00:10:47,923 I had a delivery for Miss Scarlett. 151 00:10:47,947 --> 00:10:50,059 I saw her car in the theatre. 152 00:10:50,083 --> 00:10:51,107 So I went in... 153 00:10:57,924 --> 00:11:01,270 Bad boy! Playing Peeping Tom on naked ladies! 154 00:11:01,294 --> 00:11:03,405 I wasn't. I... 155 00:11:03,429 --> 00:11:05,207 You'll go to hell for that. 156 00:11:05,231 --> 00:11:08,133 I brought your nerve powder from Dr. Cornelius. 157 00:11:09,836 --> 00:11:13,603 Was it worth it, Benny? Did you like what you saw? 158 00:11:15,108 --> 00:11:17,953 There was no mention of this in your statement. 159 00:11:17,977 --> 00:11:20,990 Benny can't read. 160 00:11:21,014 --> 00:11:23,826 The policeman wrote it and said if I signed it, 161 00:11:23,850 --> 00:11:26,081 then I'd be home in time for Christmas. 162 00:11:28,154 --> 00:11:30,466 Lying's a Ten Commandment, isn't it, Father? 163 00:11:30,490 --> 00:11:32,959 Number nine. Loud and clear. 164 00:11:35,128 --> 00:11:39,175 What about in court? Why did you plead guilty? 165 00:11:39,199 --> 00:11:40,861 Ma said it was for the best. 166 00:11:42,535 --> 00:11:45,130 Maybe I should have a word with your ma. 167 00:11:45,939 --> 00:11:47,532 She doesn't like policemen. 168 00:11:51,444 --> 00:11:53,106 I'll take a chaperone. 169 00:11:56,316 --> 00:11:57,614 Buttons, beware... 170 00:12:02,121 --> 00:12:03,851 Buttons, beware... 171 00:12:05,391 --> 00:12:08,837 The tree of truth will hear a lie. 172 00:12:08,861 --> 00:12:12,696 The tree of truth will hear a lie and drop an apple in your eye. 173 00:12:17,670 --> 00:12:19,104 Good luck, Buttons. 174 00:12:24,043 --> 00:12:26,069 Is there a girl you love, Buttons? 175 00:12:27,380 --> 00:12:29,024 No. 176 00:12:29,048 --> 00:12:31,950 There is! Is she someone I know? 177 00:12:33,019 --> 00:12:34,453 No. Ow... 178 00:12:35,054 --> 00:12:38,334 I think you're fibbing, Buttons. Who is she? 179 00:12:38,358 --> 00:12:41,294 It's... it's... 180 00:12:42,095 --> 00:12:45,507 Too early! Wait for the cue. 181 00:12:45,531 --> 00:12:47,343 Again, please! 182 00:12:47,367 --> 00:12:50,412 Be a brick, Barbara, and gather up the apples. 183 00:12:50,436 --> 00:12:51,870 Er, it's Bridg... 184 00:12:59,612 --> 00:13:02,207 I was expecting something rather more festive. 185 00:13:03,082 --> 00:13:07,630 If you mean the letters, I write what he wants to hear. 186 00:13:07,654 --> 00:13:10,132 Benny loved Christmas. 187 00:13:10,156 --> 00:13:12,591 This place would look like Santa's grotto. 188 00:13:13,860 --> 00:13:15,795 When they took him away, I burnt the lot. 189 00:13:17,096 --> 00:13:19,691 What's the point of Christmas without a child? 190 00:13:22,302 --> 00:13:23,412 Scarlett Dreyfuss... 191 00:13:23,436 --> 00:13:24,904 Was a succubus. 192 00:13:26,739 --> 00:13:28,640 - Two Cs, one B. - Thank you. 193 00:13:30,143 --> 00:13:35,047 Any male was fair game, even a child in a man's body like Benny. 194 00:13:36,482 --> 00:13:37,950 Tell me about these other men? 195 00:13:38,851 --> 00:13:41,150 Ask that amateur dramatics lot. 196 00:13:41,888 --> 00:13:47,555 And then ask yourself why the police didn't interview them at the time. 197 00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:51,330 Mrs. Clough. 198 00:13:52,031 --> 00:13:55,077 As you clearly believe your son is innocent, 199 00:13:55,101 --> 00:13:58,113 why did you get him to plead guilty? 200 00:13:58,137 --> 00:13:59,935 To save him from the noose. 201 00:14:01,240 --> 00:14:07,623 A guilty plea in return for a reduced charge of manslaughter. 202 00:14:07,647 --> 00:14:09,980 Your DI Jones was very... 203 00:14:11,617 --> 00:14:13,085 ..persuasive. 204 00:14:14,320 --> 00:14:16,532 DI Jones passed away last year. 205 00:14:16,556 --> 00:14:21,070 I'm on the case now and if there has been any irregularity, 206 00:14:21,094 --> 00:14:23,723 you have my word it will be investigated. 207 00:14:25,298 --> 00:14:26,891 And you can keep your nose out. 208 00:14:32,205 --> 00:14:34,383 This made you angry? 209 00:14:34,407 --> 00:14:35,951 Yes. 210 00:14:35,975 --> 00:14:37,853 And did you express your anger? 211 00:14:39,512 --> 00:14:40,844 It's happening again! 212 00:14:57,363 --> 00:14:59,108 That's another fine mess you've got me into. 213 00:14:59,132 --> 00:15:00,676 That's showbiz, Sid! 214 00:15:00,700 --> 00:15:04,535 If anyone sees a cloak with a hood, I need it for the forest scene. 215 00:15:09,676 --> 00:15:10,699 - Ow! - Sidney! 216 00:15:11,911 --> 00:15:13,956 You look like a fairy tale! 217 00:15:13,980 --> 00:15:15,958 It's a bit big. 218 00:15:15,982 --> 00:15:19,714 Well, a few alterations will soon fix that. 219 00:15:23,923 --> 00:15:26,085 I read all about the Red Riding Hood murder. 220 00:15:28,161 --> 00:15:29,601 I suppose she was a friend of yours? 221 00:15:30,163 --> 00:15:31,707 She was a piece of work. 222 00:15:31,731 --> 00:15:35,444 Translation - she stole the leading lady role from under your nose. 223 00:15:35,468 --> 00:15:38,147 I meant poor Douglas. 224 00:15:38,171 --> 00:15:41,150 He was engaged to a nice WAAF before she got her claws in him. 225 00:15:41,174 --> 00:15:43,143 And that ghastly scene at the dress rehearsal! 226 00:15:44,410 --> 00:15:47,623 I can't. Not here. I can't. 227 00:15:47,647 --> 00:15:49,343 Something tells me that you can. 228 00:15:50,883 --> 00:15:53,682 You stupid, stupid boy. 229 00:15:54,887 --> 00:15:57,166 You do know he's engaged to be married? 230 00:15:57,190 --> 00:15:59,868 Maybe he can make an honest woman out of me, instead. 231 00:15:59,892 --> 00:16:01,170 Then the flash pot went off, 232 00:16:02,062 --> 00:16:04,963 and Douglas had one of his episodes and bolted. 233 00:16:06,432 --> 00:16:10,096 He'll marry the likes of you over my dead body. 234 00:16:16,976 --> 00:16:17,976 Episodes? 235 00:16:19,145 --> 00:16:20,656 He had a bad war. 236 00:16:20,680 --> 00:16:24,293 I was treating him for shell shock, and he was responding well until... 237 00:16:24,317 --> 00:16:27,262 Marvelous, we're a wardrobe mistress short. 238 00:16:27,286 --> 00:16:29,998 Think you can double with prompt, Barbara? 239 00:16:30,022 --> 00:16:32,968 Well, I'm not sure I'm qualified, and it is Bri... 240 00:16:32,992 --> 00:16:35,838 That's the spirit. You can start by sorting this lot out. 241 00:16:35,862 --> 00:16:39,274 The police need to speak to us about Scarlett. 242 00:16:39,298 --> 00:16:40,732 They're in the scene dock. 243 00:16:42,001 --> 00:16:43,979 Well, you don't think any of us did it? 244 00:16:44,003 --> 00:16:46,615 I'm merely following up on some loose ends. 245 00:16:46,639 --> 00:16:49,651 And as Miss Dreyfuss was last seen alive in the theatre... 246 00:16:49,675 --> 00:16:51,954 Well, my husband will vouch for me. 247 00:16:51,978 --> 00:16:53,755 He most certainly can. 248 00:16:53,779 --> 00:16:55,190 - Sir. - Superintendent. 249 00:16:55,214 --> 00:16:57,843 At ease, lads. It's plain Mr. Sturgess now. 250 00:16:58,951 --> 00:17:00,162 I wasn't aware. 251 00:17:00,186 --> 00:17:02,564 This gorgeous creature's my wife. 252 00:17:02,588 --> 00:17:05,667 And how's retirement treating you, sir... Mr. Sturgess? 253 00:17:05,691 --> 00:17:08,804 As you see, she's roped me in as Baron Hardup. 254 00:17:08,828 --> 00:17:11,740 And why all the interest in the Dreyfuss case? 255 00:17:11,764 --> 00:17:13,289 A word in private. 256 00:17:18,337 --> 00:17:19,948 Should I say something? 257 00:17:19,972 --> 00:17:22,484 Say what, exactly? 258 00:17:22,508 --> 00:17:25,672 You will say nothing to the police, Douglas. 259 00:17:27,980 --> 00:17:33,529 And we discovered he may have been duped into signing it by DI Jones. 260 00:17:33,553 --> 00:17:37,285 Who is unfortunately deceased and thus unable to defend himself. 261 00:17:38,658 --> 00:17:40,969 - But, sir... - It's a can of worms. 262 00:17:40,993 --> 00:17:44,306 You want the public thinking we left a killer on the loose? 263 00:17:44,330 --> 00:17:48,544 I'd call that a catastrophic own goal for community relations. 264 00:17:48,568 --> 00:17:49,763 Is that clear, son? 265 00:17:51,203 --> 00:17:52,781 Perfectly, Mr. Sturgess. 266 00:17:52,805 --> 00:17:55,984 On the subject of which, we're still short on cast, 267 00:17:56,008 --> 00:17:58,954 and I'm sure the public would appreciate a police involvement 268 00:17:58,978 --> 00:18:00,789 in such a community event. 269 00:18:00,813 --> 00:18:02,224 Happy to oblige, sir. 270 00:18:02,248 --> 00:18:04,960 Good man. Good men. 271 00:18:04,984 --> 00:18:06,953 Found you some volunteers, Pru... 272 00:18:09,689 --> 00:18:13,001 Lucky for you, I've no intention of dropping anything. 273 00:18:13,025 --> 00:18:14,536 We can do some sniffing around. 274 00:18:14,560 --> 00:18:18,497 I'm sure we can manage seventh and eighth villager. 275 00:18:20,566 --> 00:18:22,244 I'm sorry, sir. 276 00:18:22,268 --> 00:18:24,430 Oh, you will be, Sergeant. 277 00:18:25,104 --> 00:18:26,949 Oh, they're a lovely fit. 278 00:18:26,973 --> 00:18:30,052 Here are your scripts, and we'll see you at rehearsals tomorrow. 279 00:18:30,076 --> 00:18:32,841 And when you're finished with those, just hang them up on the rail. 280 00:18:38,517 --> 00:18:40,679 Will you help me out of my dress, sir, please? 281 00:18:58,004 --> 00:19:01,917 I'm all a-quiver when the moonbeams dance 282 00:19:01,941 --> 00:19:05,687 That is the moment when I long to dance 283 00:19:05,711 --> 00:19:08,757 I can never close a sleepy eye 284 00:19:08,781 --> 00:19:12,445 When the moon comes creeping through the sky. 285 00:19:13,552 --> 00:19:15,497 Is this what you were looking for? 286 00:19:15,521 --> 00:19:17,532 If you're a fairy, can you grant me three wishes? 287 00:19:17,556 --> 00:19:18,900 Ugh! Where did you find that? 288 00:19:18,924 --> 00:19:22,537 In one of the costume trunks. Is something wrong? 289 00:19:22,561 --> 00:19:25,273 Prompt! Prompt! 290 00:19:25,297 --> 00:19:28,699 Who do you think I am? The genie of the lamp? 291 00:19:30,002 --> 00:19:31,780 Is something wrong? 292 00:19:31,804 --> 00:19:33,649 That's Red Riding Hood's cloak. 293 00:19:33,673 --> 00:19:36,218 Dead woman's cloak. She wore it on the day she died. 294 00:19:36,242 --> 00:19:38,854 Very well. One. But be careful what you wish for, Buttons. 295 00:19:38,878 --> 00:19:41,790 - The tree of truth hears everything. - Exit stage right. Lights down. 296 00:19:41,814 --> 00:19:43,158 Something to share, Mrs. McCarthy? 297 00:19:43,182 --> 00:19:45,927 If she wouldn't be seen dead in this, then I'm wondering 298 00:19:45,951 --> 00:19:48,921 why was her address found in the pocket? 299 00:19:52,658 --> 00:19:55,651 I think you're fibbing, Buttons. Who is she? 300 00:19:56,929 --> 00:19:58,158 Oh, how wonderful! 301 00:19:59,198 --> 00:20:02,930 Oh, how wonderful, tickets for the royal ball. 302 00:20:05,604 --> 00:20:09,336 Think of it as detention. There might be something we missed. 303 00:20:10,609 --> 00:20:12,988 And it's more productive than writing out 100 times, 304 00:20:13,012 --> 00:20:15,223 "I must not volunteer my superior officer 305 00:20:15,247 --> 00:20:17,526 for the part "of Ugly Sister." 306 00:20:17,550 --> 00:20:22,664 Actually, sir, we did miss something - or rather, something's missing. 307 00:20:22,688 --> 00:20:25,100 Benny Clough made deliveries near Scarlett's house 308 00:20:25,124 --> 00:20:26,668 on the evening in question. 309 00:20:26,692 --> 00:20:29,004 All were followed up and statements taken. 310 00:20:29,028 --> 00:20:32,692 But there's one missing. Made by a Peggy Semple. 311 00:20:33,899 --> 00:20:34,976 And she is? 312 00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:37,546 No idea, sir. There's no record of her locally. 313 00:20:37,570 --> 00:20:40,062 - You sure it isn't just misfiled? - No, sir. 314 00:20:41,741 --> 00:20:46,588 You can see where the staple has been taken out 315 00:20:46,612 --> 00:20:48,604 and where it's been re-stapled. 316 00:20:51,150 --> 00:20:52,778 Quite the Dr. Watson. 317 00:20:56,989 --> 00:20:58,082 Good luck, Buttons. 318 00:21:04,130 --> 00:21:07,075 Is there a girl you love, Buttons? 319 00:21:07,099 --> 00:21:08,099 No. 320 00:21:11,003 --> 00:21:12,114 Ow. 321 00:21:12,138 --> 00:21:15,597 There is! Is she someone I know? 322 00:21:16,675 --> 00:21:17,675 No. 323 00:21:20,045 --> 00:21:21,656 Ow. 324 00:21:21,680 --> 00:21:23,876 I think you're fibbing, Buttons. Who is she? 325 00:21:24,650 --> 00:21:28,764 It's... it's... 326 00:21:28,788 --> 00:21:29,931 Vulgaria! 327 00:21:40,933 --> 00:21:43,445 What's the prognosis, Doctor? 328 00:21:43,469 --> 00:21:46,681 Sadly, I am a doctor of philosophy, not medicine. 329 00:21:46,705 --> 00:21:48,583 I thought... your clinic... 330 00:21:48,607 --> 00:21:50,886 I practice psychodynamic therapy, 331 00:21:50,910 --> 00:21:54,122 focusing on psychological functioning and change. 332 00:21:54,146 --> 00:21:55,524 Ah. 333 00:21:55,548 --> 00:22:01,886 But I can tell you he's in a deep coma and not expected to wake up. 334 00:22:13,032 --> 00:22:16,332 Silly boy. It was his own fault. 335 00:22:17,670 --> 00:22:19,639 He was in charge of numbering the ropes. 336 00:22:21,006 --> 00:22:23,737 But his head's been all over the place since... 337 00:22:24,677 --> 00:22:26,612 Since Scarlett's body was discovered. 338 00:22:27,680 --> 00:22:29,124 Forgive me for eavesdropping, 339 00:22:29,148 --> 00:22:32,016 but I overheard him saying he wanted to go to the police. 340 00:22:35,521 --> 00:22:37,490 The night Scarlett went missing... 341 00:22:39,225 --> 00:22:42,571 ..he didn't come home after leaving the theatre. 342 00:22:42,595 --> 00:22:45,588 Staggered back at dawn covered in mud and leaves. 343 00:22:46,565 --> 00:22:50,912 Couldn't remember where he'd been or what he'd done, but... 344 00:22:50,936 --> 00:22:54,270 ..when Benny confessed, I could see the relief in his eyes. 345 00:22:55,374 --> 00:22:58,820 And then the police started questioning his conviction. 346 00:22:58,844 --> 00:23:02,557 Douglas was getting flashbacks to the woods that night, 347 00:23:02,581 --> 00:23:03,825 and he was frightened. 348 00:23:03,849 --> 00:23:05,794 Of what he might remember? 349 00:23:05,818 --> 00:23:07,150 I wouldn't have blamed him. 350 00:23:08,621 --> 00:23:11,614 Douglas and Lizzie, his fiancee, were made for each other. 351 00:23:12,892 --> 00:23:17,057 She was even prepared to forgive his... blip with Scarlett. 352 00:23:17,830 --> 00:23:22,234 Idiot boy broke it off anyway. "I'm not worthy." 353 00:23:24,169 --> 00:23:27,333 Now I wonder if it's because he thought she'd be marrying a killer. 354 00:23:28,374 --> 00:23:29,603 I will pray for him. 355 00:23:34,980 --> 00:23:37,142 Shall I take this back to the theatre? 356 00:23:38,517 --> 00:23:40,328 I expect they'll be needing it. 357 00:23:40,352 --> 00:23:42,597 Of course, Father. 358 00:23:42,621 --> 00:23:44,055 The show must go on. 359 00:23:57,403 --> 00:23:59,180 How are you planning on getting into heaven 360 00:23:59,204 --> 00:24:00,849 if you're scared of heights, Father? 361 00:24:00,873 --> 00:24:05,287 I'm sincerely hoping there's an escalator. What can you see? 362 00:24:05,311 --> 00:24:08,509 They're all numbered and there's a list on the blackboard. 363 00:24:10,215 --> 00:24:11,877 Line 3, apple bucket. 364 00:24:14,053 --> 00:24:17,956 Yeah, you were right, Father. Up here it says eight. 365 00:24:23,996 --> 00:24:27,956 I wanted to ask if you recognize the name Peggy Semple? 366 00:24:29,201 --> 00:24:31,864 She always gave me milk and biscuits for the ride home. 367 00:24:33,339 --> 00:24:37,674 You made a delivery to her the night Scarlett went missing. 368 00:24:39,278 --> 00:24:42,407 Not to Peggy - she's the maid. To Miss Sturgess. 369 00:24:45,250 --> 00:24:49,664 Peggy Semple is the Sturgess' maid? 370 00:24:49,688 --> 00:24:54,558 I had the wrong prescription from Dr. Cornelius. She got angry. 371 00:24:55,861 --> 00:24:56,861 She hit me. 372 00:24:58,163 --> 00:25:00,342 Hey, you, wait. 373 00:25:00,366 --> 00:25:02,677 It's the wrong one. 374 00:25:02,701 --> 00:25:04,169 Well, this isn't mine! 375 00:25:05,838 --> 00:25:07,882 Where's mine? Hmm? 376 00:25:07,906 --> 00:25:09,784 Is it in there? 377 00:25:09,808 --> 00:25:11,276 I ain't got anything else! 378 00:25:12,644 --> 00:25:15,657 There's no need to get in a tizz. Let's get you inside, 379 00:25:15,681 --> 00:25:17,547 we can call the doctor and sort it out. 380 00:25:32,598 --> 00:25:35,010 Thank you Benny. That's very helpful. 381 00:25:35,034 --> 00:25:36,559 Does it mean I can go home? 382 00:25:39,838 --> 00:25:41,966 I'm working on it, son. 383 00:25:50,082 --> 00:25:52,127 Peggy left us years ago. 384 00:25:52,151 --> 00:25:56,865 Got married to a drayman from Largs and was off without a by-your-leave. 385 00:25:56,889 --> 00:25:59,434 Do you recollect her account of events on the evening 386 00:25:59,458 --> 00:26:01,503 that Scarlett Dreyfuss disappeared? 387 00:26:01,527 --> 00:26:04,339 Would you mind explaining where this is leading? 388 00:26:04,363 --> 00:26:06,041 The statement is missing, sir. 389 00:26:06,065 --> 00:26:08,309 And for one thing, it could explain 390 00:26:08,333 --> 00:26:10,378 the scratches on Benny Clough's face. 391 00:26:10,402 --> 00:26:13,065 I told you to stop flogging that dead horse. 392 00:26:14,006 --> 00:26:19,502 With respect, that isn't your prerogative any more, Mr. Sturgess. 393 00:26:20,879 --> 00:26:22,404 Friendly warning, boys. 394 00:26:23,849 --> 00:26:27,295 I may be retired, but one phone call from me 395 00:26:27,319 --> 00:26:31,313 and you'll both spend the rest of your careers directing traffic. 396 00:26:32,491 --> 00:26:34,221 Do I make myself clear? 397 00:26:44,002 --> 00:26:49,984 Good King Wenceslas looked out On the Feast of Stephen 398 00:26:50,008 --> 00:26:55,824 When the snow lay 'round about Deep and crisp and even... 399 00:26:55,848 --> 00:26:57,559 Now what, sir? 400 00:26:57,583 --> 00:26:58,726 You heard the man. 401 00:26:58,750 --> 00:27:02,130 Any more digging and we'll be on traffic duty. 402 00:27:02,154 --> 00:27:04,432 There is something you could try. 403 00:27:04,456 --> 00:27:06,334 You mean someone. 404 00:27:06,358 --> 00:27:08,503 Think of it like Christmas Day on the Somme. 405 00:27:08,527 --> 00:27:10,257 The German and British football match. 406 00:27:10,562 --> 00:27:13,191 The German and British football match. 407 00:27:13,966 --> 00:27:19,013 No-man's-land. Different sides, but playing the same game. 408 00:27:19,037 --> 00:27:22,851 Then on Boxing Day, it's back to knocking seven bells out of each other? 409 00:27:22,875 --> 00:27:23,899 Exactly. 410 00:27:32,551 --> 00:27:34,884 Lad seems barely older than our John. 411 00:27:37,122 --> 00:27:38,933 Perhaps you can get on the blower to him upstairs. 412 00:27:38,957 --> 00:27:41,791 Ask for a miracle and get him home in time for Christmas. 413 00:27:48,200 --> 00:27:49,691 You only had to ask. 414 00:28:07,085 --> 00:28:08,463 Forgot my car keys. 415 00:28:08,487 --> 00:28:10,398 Did no one teach you to knock? 416 00:28:10,422 --> 00:28:12,550 Oh, you wouldn't believe the gaps in my education. 417 00:28:14,893 --> 00:28:15,952 Toodle-oo. 418 00:28:28,574 --> 00:28:31,286 I think Douglas saw someone in the woods. 419 00:28:31,310 --> 00:28:33,087 And when his memory started to return 420 00:28:33,111 --> 00:28:36,391 they tampered with the rope numbers and... 421 00:28:36,415 --> 00:28:38,193 - Oh, Sidney. - Sorry. 422 00:28:38,217 --> 00:28:42,230 And why did Scarlett have Rose Marie's address in her pocket? 423 00:28:42,254 --> 00:28:45,088 Which leads us back to the missing statement. 424 00:28:45,958 --> 00:28:50,338 Retired Superintendent Sturgess is starting to look fishier than Billingsgate. 425 00:28:50,362 --> 00:28:52,106 What is he hiding? 426 00:28:52,130 --> 00:28:53,792 I think I might hazard a guess. 427 00:28:59,838 --> 00:29:02,417 Dandini, exit stage left. 428 00:29:02,441 --> 00:29:07,004 Left! And thank you, Hernia. 429 00:29:09,214 --> 00:29:13,728 Ooh, how wonderful. Tickets for the royal ball. 430 00:29:13,752 --> 00:29:18,122 Yes, and I hear the Prince has the largest balls in all the land. 431 00:29:18,557 --> 00:29:20,602 Ooh, you are a one. 432 00:29:20,626 --> 00:29:22,570 Can we have that a bit harder? 433 00:29:22,594 --> 00:29:25,139 Ooh, you are a one. 434 00:29:25,163 --> 00:29:28,943 Right, there's going to be a change of cast. I'm Hernia. He's Vulgaria. 435 00:29:28,967 --> 00:29:31,746 If that's all right with you, Sergeant? 436 00:29:31,770 --> 00:29:35,883 Now I suggest we start from Dandini leaving, 437 00:29:35,907 --> 00:29:39,554 giving me the tickets for the ball, yes? 438 00:29:39,578 --> 00:29:41,289 Thank you, Prudence. 439 00:29:41,313 --> 00:29:43,291 Ooh, you are a one. 440 00:29:43,315 --> 00:29:44,959 Ow! 441 00:29:44,983 --> 00:29:48,296 Do that again and I'll... I'll box your ears. 442 00:29:48,320 --> 00:29:51,299 You can't box. Can she, boys and girls? 443 00:29:51,323 --> 00:29:52,934 Oh, yes, she can. 444 00:29:52,958 --> 00:29:56,292 Et cetera. Then pick up from Hernia, "Show me, then." 445 00:29:59,231 --> 00:30:00,597 Show me, then. 446 00:30:33,298 --> 00:30:36,411 White heroin is my guess. You can't get that on prescription. 447 00:30:36,435 --> 00:30:39,781 And that address label was identical to the one found in Scarlett's cloak. 448 00:30:39,805 --> 00:30:42,900 Benny delivered nerve powders to Scarlett. Yes, of course... 449 00:30:46,044 --> 00:30:47,205 Care to share it? 450 00:30:48,914 --> 00:30:52,544 Benny can't read. He mixed up the prescriptions. 451 00:30:57,155 --> 00:30:59,818 Naughty Rose Marie. 452 00:31:02,561 --> 00:31:04,038 But this isn't mine. 453 00:31:04,062 --> 00:31:05,873 And Rose Marie got Scarlett's. 454 00:31:05,897 --> 00:31:09,477 Where's mine? Is it in there? 455 00:31:09,501 --> 00:31:11,367 I haven't got anything else. 456 00:31:12,637 --> 00:31:17,118 Cornelius isn't a physician. He's a Doctor of Philosophy. 457 00:31:17,142 --> 00:31:20,188 So the good doctor supplies Rose Marie with something 458 00:31:20,212 --> 00:31:22,824 rather more efficacious than nerve powders. 459 00:31:24,816 --> 00:31:27,829 The Superintendent's junkie missus in possession of illegal drugs. 460 00:31:27,853 --> 00:31:29,464 You can see why he'd want to keep that quiet. 461 00:31:29,488 --> 00:31:30,865 It's all starting to make sense. 462 00:31:30,889 --> 00:31:35,069 Scarlett found out about Rose Marie's dirty little secret and confronted her. 463 00:31:35,093 --> 00:31:36,971 He'd be ruined if it got out. 464 00:31:36,995 --> 00:31:39,607 That's one big motive for murder. 465 00:31:39,631 --> 00:31:42,677 Speculation, though. You can't actually prove it. 466 00:31:42,701 --> 00:31:44,379 Which means we're back to square one. 467 00:31:44,403 --> 00:31:47,237 There is a way. But we'll have to wait till daylight. 468 00:31:53,044 --> 00:31:54,044 Hello. 469 00:31:58,417 --> 00:32:00,477 Well, then, is this our man? 470 00:32:02,320 --> 00:32:05,688 Hello, old chap. You look like you've been in the wars. 471 00:32:08,527 --> 00:32:10,325 Does this look like nerve powder to you? 472 00:32:16,201 --> 00:32:17,863 This is all very cloak-and-dagger. 473 00:32:20,005 --> 00:32:24,619 The tree of truth. I thought it rather apt. 474 00:32:24,643 --> 00:32:26,373 Don't worry about another accident. 475 00:32:27,546 --> 00:32:30,243 Although why would you, seeing as you planned it? 476 00:32:31,216 --> 00:32:34,896 I've heard you fancy yourself as the local Miss Marple. 477 00:32:34,920 --> 00:32:38,065 Tell me why I would wish to harm someone 478 00:32:38,089 --> 00:32:41,335 as inoffensive as poor Douglas? 479 00:32:41,359 --> 00:32:44,939 Because he was in the woods the night Scarlett disappeared, 480 00:32:44,963 --> 00:32:46,941 and saw something he shouldn't. 481 00:32:46,965 --> 00:32:49,901 I take it you mean me. Fascinating. 482 00:32:50,869 --> 00:32:54,115 So in addition to the attempted murder of Douglas, 483 00:32:54,139 --> 00:32:56,951 you are also accusing me of Scarlett's murder? 484 00:32:56,975 --> 00:32:58,519 No. Not at all. 485 00:32:58,543 --> 00:33:01,756 I think we both know she died by her own hand. 486 00:33:01,780 --> 00:33:02,780 Pray go on. 487 00:33:04,483 --> 00:33:07,161 Benny mixed up the prescriptions. 488 00:33:07,185 --> 00:33:09,484 Rose Marie wasn't your only addict. 489 00:33:12,991 --> 00:33:17,793 I'm reliably informed that this is cocaine - intended for Scarlett. 490 00:33:18,630 --> 00:33:22,043 But instead she received something far more deadly. 491 00:33:22,067 --> 00:33:25,401 White heroin, intended for Rose Marie. 492 00:33:26,137 --> 00:33:27,515 Where did you find that? 493 00:33:27,539 --> 00:33:29,484 In Benny's saddlebag. 494 00:33:29,508 --> 00:33:32,410 He was arrested before he could return it. 495 00:33:33,311 --> 00:33:35,456 Benny made deliveries for the whole village. 496 00:33:35,480 --> 00:33:37,492 There's nothing to connect that with me. 497 00:33:37,516 --> 00:33:40,194 And if the police questioned you, you'd just deny it. 498 00:33:40,218 --> 00:33:43,586 And sue you for slander for good measure. 499 00:33:45,590 --> 00:33:48,856 Some would argue that the right man was punished for the crime. 500 00:33:50,495 --> 00:33:52,293 An interesting perspective. 501 00:33:53,398 --> 00:33:55,676 If Benny hadn't mixed up the packages... 502 00:33:55,700 --> 00:33:58,112 Finally, someone with some sense. 503 00:33:58,136 --> 00:34:00,469 Idiot boy got what he deserved. 504 00:34:02,407 --> 00:34:04,638 Rose Marie alerted you to the switch? 505 00:34:05,810 --> 00:34:09,957 Scarlett was vapid and greedy. Wouldn't think to check what it was. 506 00:34:09,981 --> 00:34:14,395 And if she believed it to be cocaine and inhaled it - 507 00:34:14,419 --> 00:34:16,217 the results would've been fatal. 508 00:34:17,055 --> 00:34:19,752 When she didn't answer her telephone, I drove to her house. 509 00:34:20,926 --> 00:34:24,124 I knew it would be traced back to me eventually. 510 00:34:31,970 --> 00:34:34,599 It seemed expedient to dispose of the evidence. 511 00:34:42,847 --> 00:34:44,941 And that was when you saw Douglas? 512 00:34:50,488 --> 00:34:52,733 I could see he was in a fugue state 513 00:34:52,757 --> 00:34:54,191 and would have no recollection. 514 00:34:55,093 --> 00:34:57,772 When the simpleton confessed, it was karma. 515 00:34:57,796 --> 00:35:01,164 The gods' way of telling me I wasn't to blame. 516 00:35:02,701 --> 00:35:05,646 Easier to let an innocent go to jail. 517 00:35:05,670 --> 00:35:08,249 Feed him and keep him warm, and I doubt he knows the difference. 518 00:35:08,273 --> 00:35:12,353 A being of no function to society, whereas I... 519 00:35:12,377 --> 00:35:17,425 You are a common drug peddler. 520 00:35:17,449 --> 00:35:22,496 Condemning your victims to a long, slow death of body and soul. 521 00:35:22,520 --> 00:35:25,099 Desperate wives in gilded cages. 522 00:35:25,123 --> 00:35:27,001 I give these women a reason to live. 523 00:35:27,025 --> 00:35:30,071 You give them a reason not to live. 524 00:35:30,095 --> 00:35:31,872 Dr. Cornelius, 525 00:35:31,896 --> 00:35:36,391 an admission would be the first step toward repentance and God's grace. 526 00:35:37,569 --> 00:35:43,484 Fascinating as this has been, my only concern is with earthly repercussion. 527 00:35:43,508 --> 00:35:45,820 And as none of it can be proved, 528 00:35:45,844 --> 00:35:47,176 at least I'll escape that. 529 00:35:49,581 --> 00:35:51,914 Oh, no, you won't. 530 00:35:53,151 --> 00:35:54,551 Behind you. 531 00:35:55,720 --> 00:35:57,665 Did you get all that, Sergeant? 532 00:35:57,689 --> 00:36:02,670 - Yes, sir, I did. - Good. Eugene Cornelius... 533 00:36:02,694 --> 00:36:06,374 "has been charged with attempted murder, unlawful burial 534 00:36:06,398 --> 00:36:09,210 "and supply of illegal drugs." 535 00:36:09,234 --> 00:36:11,646 Oh, and Rose Marie's in front of the bench, 536 00:36:11,670 --> 00:36:13,280 which is a five-minute wonder, 537 00:36:13,304 --> 00:36:14,795 but at least she's getting treatment. 538 00:36:17,509 --> 00:36:20,955 The doctors say I should talk to him in case he can hear me. 539 00:36:20,979 --> 00:36:23,324 I hope he can. 540 00:36:23,348 --> 00:36:25,817 I don't want him to die thinking he was a murderer. 541 00:36:28,653 --> 00:36:29,848 Have you come to pray? 542 00:36:30,488 --> 00:36:32,218 Not on this occasion. No. 543 00:36:33,324 --> 00:36:34,587 Come in. 544 00:36:37,162 --> 00:36:38,687 Hello, Prudence. 545 00:36:45,603 --> 00:36:48,182 Hello, Douglas. 546 00:36:48,206 --> 00:36:51,870 Sometimes love is the most powerful prayer. 547 00:37:06,658 --> 00:37:10,471 Fairy Godmother! Has anyone seen Fairy Godmother? 548 00:37:10,495 --> 00:37:13,941 We've half an hour till curtain and... 549 00:37:13,965 --> 00:37:15,729 I call that cutting it fine. 550 00:37:19,037 --> 00:37:22,116 Oh, nonsense. Stage fright. 551 00:37:22,140 --> 00:37:24,166 Honey and lemon will do the trick. 552 00:37:27,378 --> 00:37:31,782 Disaster. We can't do Cinderella without a fairy godmother! 553 00:37:33,017 --> 00:37:35,429 Who the blazes is Bridget? 554 00:37:35,453 --> 00:37:36,716 - I am. - She is. 555 00:37:37,655 --> 00:37:39,317 I can't possibly. 556 00:37:41,760 --> 00:37:43,456 But I have nothing to wear. 557 00:38:02,580 --> 00:38:07,228 Welcome, good folk one and all. 558 00:38:07,252 --> 00:38:10,064 Let me be your guiding hand, 559 00:38:10,088 --> 00:38:13,991 and lead you through this magic land. 560 00:38:22,000 --> 00:38:24,945 Phew, sis, that was close! 561 00:38:24,969 --> 00:38:27,281 It's behind you! 562 00:38:27,305 --> 00:38:28,705 It's what, sorry? 563 00:38:32,811 --> 00:38:33,811 Aargh! 564 00:38:37,916 --> 00:38:41,028 Ow! You do that again and I'll box your ears. 565 00:38:41,052 --> 00:38:43,798 You can't box. Can she, boys and girls? 566 00:38:43,822 --> 00:38:45,533 Oh, yes, she can! 567 00:38:45,557 --> 00:38:47,134 Oh, no, she can't. 568 00:38:47,158 --> 00:38:49,303 Oh, yes, she can! 569 00:38:49,327 --> 00:38:50,538 Oh, no, she can't. 570 00:38:50,562 --> 00:38:53,073 Oh, yes, she can! 571 00:38:53,097 --> 00:38:54,531 Right, come on, show me, then. 572 00:39:03,641 --> 00:39:05,667 You said go left, you always go left! 573 00:39:12,718 --> 00:39:15,129 Mice medley, go! That's it. 574 00:39:15,153 --> 00:39:16,644 Right to the other side of the stage. 575 00:39:26,164 --> 00:39:28,576 Good news. Benny's being released - he'll be home tomorrow. 576 00:39:28,600 --> 00:39:31,434 On Christmas Eve. How mirac... 577 00:39:32,470 --> 00:39:35,082 Back on your feet, Hernia! You've got the ballroom! 578 00:39:35,106 --> 00:39:38,052 - Not in this corset, I haven't. - Come on, sir, up you get. 579 00:39:38,076 --> 00:39:40,978 Laryngitis? I suppose you felt sorry for me. 580 00:39:41,679 --> 00:39:44,672 Well, I do not need your pity. 581 00:39:45,617 --> 00:39:47,595 Oh, typical. It's all about you. 582 00:39:47,619 --> 00:39:51,665 Well, you knew that I was worse than Pontius Pilate, 583 00:39:51,689 --> 00:39:54,869 but you would have let me go out there to the ruin of my reputation! 584 00:39:54,893 --> 00:39:58,973 Yes. I mean, no, you were making a great improvement. 585 00:39:58,997 --> 00:40:01,242 Fairy Godmother! Transformation scene! 586 00:40:01,266 --> 00:40:05,112 Ask yourself this - what would my aunt say? 587 00:40:05,136 --> 00:40:06,570 Chop, chop, Barbara! 588 00:40:12,010 --> 00:40:13,535 Nice work, Penelope. 589 00:40:16,281 --> 00:40:20,810 Cinderella. You shall go to the ball. 590 00:40:28,293 --> 00:40:31,805 Let me fit my foot in the crystal slipper. 591 00:40:31,829 --> 00:40:34,389 You couldn't fit your foot in Crystal Palace! 592 00:40:36,367 --> 00:40:39,613 My gift to you of joy and laughter, 593 00:40:39,637 --> 00:40:42,971 as you live happily ever after. 594 00:41:25,550 --> 00:41:26,745 Mum? 595 00:41:43,234 --> 00:41:46,170 Oh, it's so good to have you home! 596 00:41:54,178 --> 00:41:56,113 I'm sorry I lied. 597 00:41:57,048 --> 00:42:00,194 It just wasn't Christmas on my own. 598 00:42:00,218 --> 00:42:05,122 But next year, I promise we'll make it the best one ever. 599 00:42:05,990 --> 00:42:07,822 Yeah, next year. The best one ever! 600 00:42:18,836 --> 00:42:20,314 Merry Christmas, Mrs. Clough. 601 00:42:20,338 --> 00:42:22,783 Do you mind moving aside? This thing's damn heavy. 602 00:42:22,807 --> 00:42:24,618 Merry Christmas! 603 00:42:24,642 --> 00:42:28,022 We thought you could do with a transfusion of Christmas cheer. 604 00:42:28,046 --> 00:42:30,124 One turkey, fully prepared. 605 00:42:30,148 --> 00:42:32,793 So all you have to do is pop it in the oven tomorrow. 606 00:42:32,817 --> 00:42:35,311 Merry Christmas! 607 00:42:44,595 --> 00:42:50,677 Ding dong merrily on high In heav'n the bells are ringing 608 00:42:50,701 --> 00:42:56,402 Ding dong verily the sky Is riv'n with angel singing. 609 00:42:57,708 --> 00:42:59,219 Merry Christmas, everyone! 610 00:42:59,243 --> 00:43:01,178 Merry Christmas! 611 00:43:02,480 --> 00:43:08,562 Gloria Hosanna in excelsis! 612 00:43:08,586 --> 00:43:13,923 Pray you, dutifully prime Your matin chime, ye ringers.